BREAKING POINT

Penny sighed. “Yes I know that” she said. “But I’m sure that once once you get to meet Jeremy, you wouldn’t be so worried about this… So now please, will you tell me what has been going on with you?”

Audrey smiled at her, and began to tell her about her job, and some guy from work who wanted to date her, but she wasn’t sure about him yet, and Penny was glad for the change of topic.

But Jeremy didn’t call that night and when Audrey finally went to bed and Penny called him, he said he was too busy and wouldn’t be coming home that night.

He didn’t return until the next day after Audrey left and he told Penny he was sorry and hoped he could meet Audrey some other time.

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Two days passed and Penny realized that she felt tired sometimes. And the fatigue came suddenly especially when she hadn’t even done much work. Her period wasn’t late, and she was damn scared to take a pregnancy test.

One night, Penny woke up feeling weird. Jeremy lay beside her, fast asleep, with his arms wrapped around her. Penny felt uncomfortable, and a little worried too. She shook Jeremy to wake him up, but he did not move. If she woke him up, he would feel she had done so on purpose and grunt at her.

‘Oh, how ridiculous I’m being ‘ she thought. ‘I can’t lie like this much longer. I’m getting cramp’

She moved a little to one side and lay listening to Jeremy’s regular breathing. No, she had not woken him after all.

“Oh Jeremy. Please wake up. Please”

Feeling like she could bear it no longer, Penny leaned over him and shook him gently by the shoulder.

Jeremy grunted as expected.

“What time is it?” he asked, then turned over completely so that his back was towards her. One second later, he was asleep again.

Penny felt like bursting into tears but her sense of humor had the upper hand. She smiled to herself in the dark. Her resentment faded completely. She felt a rush of tenderness for him.

“Poor darling” she thought. “I woke you up for nothing at all. I don’t feel pregnant. I’m just worried for nothing and overthinking everything as I always do”

She snuggled down beside him putting one arm round his waist, tucking her knees behind his. She smoothed his hair against her lips and breathed deeply, liking the hair lotion he used. It smelt nice, like cloves. Yes that was it exactly –just like the cloves Aunt Ann put in the apple pie on Sunday. They must go and see Aunt Ann and Uncle Charles. They would like Jeremy.

Jeremy was so….. Marvelous…. So… Terrific…

Penny fell asleep.

——————–

A few days later, Jeremy announced that he would be going on a business trip for three days and Penny, feeling that she could not face the flat alone, decided to pay that long overdue visit to her aunt and uncle.

“Good idea” Jeremy said.

Penny linked her arm in his.

“I will be so miserable without you” she said. “Even if I can talk to you on the phone… I will still miss you badly”

“Oh you sweetheart” he teased her. “Anyone would think I was going to be away for weeks”

“I know I will just hate being here alone. You have spoilt me darling” Penny said.

Jeremy sat down on the sofa and drew out a packet of cigarettes.

“You’ve got young Benny for company” he said, and flicked on his lighter.

Penny watched him absently.

“Benny is a good company while you are at the office” she admitted with a smile. “Oh, I really wish you weren’t going”

She did not add that she particularly wanted him home this week. Penny hadn’t been able to put the pregnancy thought out of her mind no matter how hard she tried and how much she wanted to. As each day passed, her fears increased and it was small wonder that Jeremy thought she was looking off color.

A careful study of her reflection in the mirror that morning had shown her two startlingly large brown eyes in a pinched, pale face. Even make up had not helped.. Except make her look feverish.. So she had rubbed it off again.

“What kind of job is it?” Penny asked, toying with the end of a pencil. Jeremy never told her about his work and he never asked her about hers. Once or twice he had picked up some illustration which she had left lying in the sitting room, and passed a vague, complimentary remark. But she knew he wasn’t really interested, the he did not take her job very seriously.

She never worked while he was at home, feeling that her moments with him were far too precious to be wasted. But she was interested in his job, and wanted to know what he did at the office. She liked to imagine him at his desk, interviewing people or having a conference. But he was always evasive about his work and changed the subject when she spoke of it.

“Oh its just a conference” he told her now. “Matter of fact it’s being held at one of my old offices before I was transfered here. Should be quite fun as I know a lot of champs up there”

“Any one I might know? Maybe someone famous ” Penny asked teasingly.

Jeremy another a resentful look.

“You are an inquisitive little idiot. Don’t you trust me?” he said

“Oh darling you know that I do” Penny said hastily. “I just wondered, that’s all”

Jeremy did not reopen the conversation,. Penny went into her kitchen to see about Benny’s evening meal. When she returned to lay the table for dinner, Jeremy gave a smile and said:

“Come and sit down for a moment and let me really look at you. I like you in those pants and gold sweater”

Penny obediently abandoned the cutlery, and went across to the sofa into Jeremy’s open arms.

“Mmmmm, you smell nice” he said, burying his face against her hair, kissing the nape of her neck and the tip of her ear. “Do you love me, Penny?”

“Oh you know I do” Penny replied breathlessly, stirred as always by Jeremy’s arms and lips. Even to be near him gave her that unaccountable thrill in the pit of her stomach, brought heat to her cheeks.